Being a Woman in a Male Dominated Workplace is… hard.

There’s a lot of other ways I would have liked to finish that sentence.

It’s… brutal. It’s full of bullsh*t. It’s almost enough to make someone quit. And some do.

I wish I could say I’ve always known how to carry myself in a tough industry. Even speaking up had a learning curve. Truthfully, I spent much of my career fawning — smiling, shrinking, and pretending things didn’t sting.

One of the most painful examples was when I was leading an HR investigation. I was doing my job, doing it well, and then out of nowhere in the meeting, a male colleague who simply didn’t like me decided to kick me out. He had no authority, no reason, just ego.

And I did… absolutely nothing.

I slinked back to my office and the spiral started.
What did I do wrong?
How did I mess this up?
Is this going to stall out my career?

I turned it all inward. It never once occurred to me that maybe he was just a jackass.

But then…

After an hour of berating myself, I finally went to the restroom. I stood there and let the anger flow, I felt the injustice, and then with fists on hips, head high, I slowed my breath until my nervous system calmed. I felt my shoulders drop. My feet planted. I took up space again.

That shift — from spinning in my head to grounding in my body — gave me the clarity I needed. And I went back to work.

Later that day, his boss came by my office to apologize. And this time, I didn’t brush it off with the usual:
“Oh, it’s fine.”
“No big deal.”
“You can’t please everyone.”

Instead, I looked him in the eye and said, “Thanks for the apology, I appreciate it. What really matters is if you talk to your foreman and tell him he was out of line. That’s never happening again.”

Confidence in the Moment

BOOM!

He listened!!!

It was the first time I said exactly what I wanted to say, in the moment I wanted to say it. And he agreed with me.

That moment changed me. It showed me that I had more control than I realized — not over others’ behavior, but over how I responded to it. It showed me the power of nervous system regulation, of awareness, and of speaking truth without apology.

Awareness is Power

Here’s what I’ve learned: women in male-dominated industries are often trained to internalize, to question themselves, to fawn or freeze instead of standing up. I still catch myself doing it sometimes.

But every time I stop shrinking, I get stronger. And every time I speak up, I give someone else permission to do the same.

So here’s the question I’ll leave you with: Where in your career are you shrinking and what would it look like to stand tall instead?

What’s next?

This is the work I now do with women in blue-collar industries every day. I help them see the hidden forces shaping their careers, regulate their nervous systems, and reclaim their leadership.

If you’re ready to stop internalizing and start standing tall, I’d love to work with you.